Weak at the knees

Finding the time for this is hard – weeks have passed since I have given any serious thought to writing. Every day life spins such a delicate and complex web of activity which distracts me from the stuff that’s really important. For example, I should spend more time thinking about my tax return. Instead, when I reach that point in the evening when I should be thinking about bettering myself or improving my quality of life there’s always a pile of washing up to do, wet laundry to hang out or an episode of Masterchef to watch. I’m a slave to domesticity. Should I leave the washing up until the morning? Is this the answer?

So already I have reneged on the agreement I made with myself to get busy running and get busy writing. Under normal circumstances this would not be a great surprise – I’m all too familiar by now with the disappointment of failing to follow through with my many and varied commitments to self improvement. I recall I spent about six weeks in Sydney in 2004 idly fantasizing about getting fit because a likeable and persistent gym membership salesman kept ringing me up and I kept deluding him (and myself) that I was going to join.

Nothing ever came of that, just like nothing ever came of the week I spent doing sit-ups and yoga in Dharamsala, imagining that I was about to embark on some sort of life altering spiritual adventure. I’m simply not self disciplined enough, that’s what I’ve been telling myself.

This is why it’s all the more frustrating that my training has been sabotaged not by this reassuringly common psychological weakness – this willingness to give up at the first hurdle – but by what I can only conclude (with my limited understanding of physiology)  is a freakish physical defect – I’m quite literally weak at the knees.

I’m quite a big fan of the philosophy of embracing pain. During my marathon training thus far I have found a way of liberating myself from the pain that begins to eat away at me at around the four kilometer mark – there’s something bittersweet about that battle to overcome the physical discomfort which is the inevitable result of pushing my body to it’s limit.

Even since my traveling days which regularly saw me dashing open my feet on rocks on exotic beaches or curled into impossible shapes on bus seats for hours and hours on endless dusty roads the fine line between pleasure and pain is something that has interested me. It’s at times like these, when my chest is heaving and shins are aching and my lungs are bursting, that I perceive that line so acutely, I know what it’s like to embrace pain – to engage with it and somehow assimilate it into my experience so that it becomes a cruel and sarcastic friend rather than a bitter foe.

This weakness in my knees is something else though. At first I ignored it, assuming that it was just another one of the background pains you have to deal with before, during and after a run. No doubt this is one of the inevitable side effects of the stressful transition a weak and flabby body must go through in order to become lean and strong, I thought. It was the experience of climbing in to bed and feeling my knees creak and click like an arthritic old man’s that alerted me to the fact that it might be a bit more serious than I had hitherto imagined.

A few possible causes have come to mind. Firstly, maybe I’m wearing the wrong shoes. With no real understanding of what I was looking for I inspected my New Balance MX1000NR’s (made in England) for about 30 seconds and then did a round of the local sports shops hoping to garner some expert advice from the sales assistants. I should’ve known better, most sports shops these days are more about fashion than fitness – as the amount of bling hanging off the staff and customers testified.

I spent 70 quid on my trainers 2 years ago when I started playing squash (that didn’t last) and I’ve frequently admired them when I’ve happened to catch sight of them in the corner of the bedroom – a bright beacon of hope in a wardrobe otherwise bereft of sporty items. Examining the small selection of really useful-looking trainers in JJB it occurred to me that I would heavily resent shelling out a similar amount for a new pair and would therefore have to do a serious amount of research before I would even consider such an extravagance. Glancing around the shop I realized that it was the wrong place for serious research. Where do the real sportsmen shop I wondered?

Secondly, it occurs to me that perhaps I’m running wrong. Before it was so cruelly curtailed, in the course of my training I developed a heartening routine which saw me do the following:

  • jog gently to the corner of the street
  • do some stretches on a expediently located horizontal bar (someone’s garden fence)
  • run down the hill to Hove Park
  • run around the park
  • run (or more often walk) back up the hill to my convenient bar for a warm down
  • home for a well deserved glance of juice and a shower

Admittedly my arms do flail around a bit more than might be deemed cool by the more sophisticated and experienced joggers I meet, but that can’t be it – maybe it’s simply that my feet are pounding the pavement a bit too hard during the latter stages of my runs – it does feel like I’m pushing myself to my limit every time, perhaps that isn’t a good thing.

What’s scary is that after two weeks of rest my knees are still giving me jip. I realize now how careful you have to be with this sort of thing, why professional footballers miss entire seasons or have to spend tens of thousands of pounds on keyhole surgery – if you mess up then it could be curtains for your career, or in my case, curtains for my ambition to run a marathon and consequently this blog.

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Morning glory

I woke at six o clock and after pushing annoying thoughts of work to the back of my mind I enjoyed a feeling of rapturous warmth and comfort. The temperature in the bedroom had attained that perfect autumnal degree; not yet so cold that the thought of climbing out of bed filled me with chill dread – but the contrast between the air in the room and under the covers was such that I could not help but roll around wallowing in the luxuriousness of it, alternately stretching and scrunching myself up into a ball and rolling around in an effort to use as much of the full width of the bed as I could.

My girlfriend is on a plane to Addis Ababa, probably almost there now, so I had the bed to myself. Although waking up next to her has it’s many charms, particularly on a day like today when I know that the only work I need to do is tinker with the odd line of code and send a few chirpy emails. We take it in turns to spoon each other and snooze in each others arms and it’s a most lovely feeling of belonging. However, this morning I was alone and it occurred to me, not for the first time, that I’ve been missing waking up lazily solo.

As my long suffering girlfriend will testify I’m a fiercely independent bachelor type, I’ve never regularly shared a bed bigger than a queen size and during the course of this last year a rather unsettling precedent has established itself in our bedroom routine which is pushing me to the absolute: somehow the woman I love has, with the best intentions in the world, inched me into the hinterland of my own sacred boudoir – I now spend most nights cramped into a quarter of the bed while she wallows in the rest.

Not only does this challenge my manhood, the innate and sexist knowledge that it’s me who should be dominating the bed, it also means that frequently I can wake in the morning with my arse hanging out into the abyss. While we laugh about it my girlfriend has suggested that this imbalance in our sleeping routine may hint at a more sinister discrepancy in our relationship and while this worries me a bit basically I think it’s just bloody unfair.

Anyway, on this particular morning as the minutes melted away and my mind found itself gradually unwinding in the glorious comfort of the supremely cosy little world I has managed to temporarily reclaim, not only did I resolve to begin more forcefully staking my claim on my half of the bed but it also occurred to me that it was a perfect morning for a run. I knew without needing to peer out from beneath the covers that it was a perfectly crisp late September day, and given that there will not be many of these between now and the marathon day in seven months time it would be incredibly poor form if I didn’t venture out before breakfast for a brisk run around the park.

So I climbed out of bed, pulled on a t-shirt and a pair of shorts, dusted off my running shoes and then sat down at my desk and switched on my computer – not the most dynamic start to my training but I feel that I want to capture this feeling while I’m able. Later on there may be distractions – there usually are – now there is peace and quiet and sunlight streaming through the bedroom window and I’m about to embark on a great adventure and I want to share it with you.

While the idea to run and write about it has been simmering for a few weeks I have not yet been presented with a good opportunity to test my resolve. There’s something enormously appealing about the idea of exercising my self-discipline in such a way: two challenges – to run and to write, on the surface one appears to be physical and the other mental, but of course there’s more to it than that, when it comes to marathon running as with so many difficulties in life that at first appear to be purely physical, the mental battle is the greater challenge.

Over the course of the next seven months I fully expect to be taken to my physical, mental and emotional limits. For me there is also a spiritual dimension. I have been categorized by those closest to me as ‘a searcher’ and although by definition I’m not entirely sure what that means I do know that part of my reason for giving myself this challenge is to seek God. I believe we can only truly perceive God – whatever It is – if we push ourselves.

I digress. Here I sit contemplating my run this morning and all the runs I will be embarking on over the coming months. I’m procrastinating. It’s time to hit the road.

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Cornered myself

When I conceived of this blog whilst driving along the M23 early one morning about a month ago  I didn’t give much thought to the hardships I would have to endure in order to succeed in what I was setting out to do, which is this:  to write about training for the London Marathon. As is so often the case with my motorway daydreams, there were plenty of romantic artistic notions bouncing around my mind but not much thought for the harsh realities of strict training schedules and – more importantly – overcoming writers block.

I admin that training for a marathon is a rather extreme method of coping with writer’s block, but after two years of idleness I decided that a mighty kick up the arse is what it will take to get me writing again. However, what I failed to grasp during those first fleeting moments of inspiration was that I would need a kick up the arse every morning for six months to get me out of bed and into my running shoes if I was to stand any chance of succeeding in my literary ambitions.

My location (the M23) on that fateful morning is not coincidental to the thought processes which led me to decide to start running – and writing again. I had spent the August bank holiday weekend on Lundy Island – one of the more exotic and remote destinations in the south west – with a group of friends which included Rachel, a keen runner who is taking part in the New York Marathon next month. Within an hour of arriving on the island (which was preceded by two hours of seasickness) Rachel set out to break the record for a Double Lundy Run, requiring her to run the entire length of the island and back again, twice – 16 miles in all, up and down some pretty steep hills too, in under 3 hours.

I was – and still am – in awe of her, imagining the dedication required to achieve that level of fitness and motivation. It was with these inspiring thoughts running riot in my head that I found myself approaching junction 7 of the M25 on that fateful Wednesday morning – as far as I’m concerned the most scenic stretch of that mighty circular – and the most enjoyable to drive too. Cruising down that long, gentle hill, my troubled little car finds it’s legs and I can easily get carried away, switching to the fast lane and joyously cruising past every other car in the vicinity. Perhaps the adrenaline was still pumping a few minutes later as I manoeuvred through light traffic on the M23 and saw the sign which inspired my great epiphany: Brighton – 26 miles.

“That’s a coincidence,” I said to myself. “This stretch of road from Gatwick to Brighton that I’ve become so familiar with during this last year is the exact length of a marathon. What a novel way to gauge the true distance of this epic race!”

I settled back in my seat and as the miles passed I continued to reflect on the challenge that Rachel has in store for her next month. It didn’t take very long for me to realise that 26 miles seems an absurdly long distance – particularly when driving it at seventy miles per hour while simultaneously imagining running. However, before that realisation struck I had already resolved to begin my training for the London Marathon next year as a means to get myself writing again. At this point I was inspired more by the neat (if somewhat gimmicky) structure that the number 26 might impose on such a wrting project (26 miles, 26 chapters, 26 weeks of training etc) than by anything to do with ultimate physical challenges or raising money for great causes. For me the challenge was to complete a writing project not complete a marathon… or so it seemed at the time. 5 miles down the road and still only halfway home I realised that the writing was probably going to be the easy part.

This is probably an opportune moment to tell you that in the aftermath of the London Marathon earlier this year I signed up for 2010 and, flushed with enthusiasm and dreams of achieving my lifelong goal of getting fit, I started jogging down the hill to the local park and returning sweaty and excited to my computer to calculate the distance I’d achieved. I succeeded on three occasions to don my running shoes before I got distracted and lost interest – the story of my life when it comes to exercise, alas. In the back of my mind all these months, tempering the feeling of failure that this latest foray into exercise engendered, has been the knowledge that I might beat the odds and get a place in the marathon next year. “How will I feel in this unlikely event?” I’ve often pondered.

Well, now is the time to find out because I’ve inadvertently foiled any plan that I may have been subconsciously entertaining to back out of the enterprise. Successfully negotiating my way out of bed and into my running shoes on three consecutive mornings last week lent something of a swagger to my posture and a bounce to my step as I carried myself around the office and finally I was tricked into revealing the cause of my good humour – I admitted to Bruno that I had entered the London Marathon and was waiting to hear if I’d got a place. My voice must’ve carried because within seconds everyone on the co-working table were involved in an animated discussion about marathons in general and my training schedule in particular.

“The odds of getting a place are pretty slim,” I explained, “Twenty to one I calculated.”
“What about the Brighton Marathon?” someone piped up helpfully, “You can do that if you don’t get a place!”

With a dawning sense of realisation I admitted that I knew nothing about it. As the pertinent details were outlined I realised that, finally, I was committed. I had cornered myself. All the cocky intellectual posturing I had been enjoying so much during the preceding weeks had led to this point and these unequivocal truths: The Brighton Marathon takes place within days of London’s so there’s no difference from a training point of view. Conceptually it’s even more appropriate subject matter for my blog, ”26 Miles to Brighton” is a perfect name for a blog about training for the Brighton Marathon. Whether I like it or not I’m running a marathon in six months time. Damn it.

It’s time to get busy training and get busy writing.

With less than a month to go you can find out how Rachel’s training is progressing here – please sponsor her!

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